


Love You

by MissReylo



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: F/M, Self-Insert
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-26
Updated: 2018-05-26
Packaged: 2019-05-14 02:31:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14760920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissReylo/pseuds/MissReylo
Summary: “Without hope, without witness...without reward,” the Doctor said.“Well, it’s the final hour,” you told him, “come on. One last adventure. Love you.”He let you go. “I love you too.”





	Love You

You choked on your tears as you softly touched the Cyberman lying on the ground. Bill. Oh, poor Bill. Your good friend. She was sleeping, she needed her rest. She needed to recover. You dreaded the moment when she would wake up and she would realize what she had been turned in to.  
“Y/N, Hazran says you need to go to sleep. You’re in shock,” Nardole said. He was standing next to you in the barn close by the solar farm.  
“But Bill...” you started.  
“...is asleep. Just like you should be. I’m going to rest, the Doctor is already resting. Come on, tomorrow we can think of a plan,” Nardole said.  
He helped you up.  
“I need to talk to the Doctor,” you said, wiping away a tear. “He probably knows how to fix Bill and get us off this hell ship and...”  
“Tomorrow,” Nardole promised.

Somebody knocked on the door of your small bedroom.  
“Come in,” you muttered.  
The woman, Hazran, entered. She was carrying a plate with some food. She was frowning.  
“Oh, I...” you said.  
“Here, you need to eat,” Hazran said. She helped you sit up straight and put the plate on your lap. “Before you ask, your friend is getting better. He’s running around and about. The children love him.”  
You smiled. “That’s the Doctor.”  
“Can I tell him he can drop by later? You haven’t left this bedroom in two days now. He’s been asking about you.”  
“It’s been two days?” you almost yelled. “But what about Bill?”  
“Bill?” Hazran flinched.  
“Our friend, the Cyberman in the barn! The Doctor probably fixed her already, didn’t he?” you asked.  
Hazran didn’t say anything when she left, her skirts rustling.

The Doctor sat down in the chair next to your bed. You had crossed your arms, your lips a thin line.  
“Y/N, you know it’s impossible to turn a Cyberman back into a human,” he said.  
“Nothing’s impossible, that’s what you always say,” you snapped.  
The Doctor smiled sadly. “And I was wrong. I thought you would be happy about that.”  
“We failed her, we failed Bill,” you muttered.  
It was true. You had been travelling with the Doctor for a longer time. She hadn’t even wanted to go on this stupid mission, she had told you she was scared.  
But you had stayed behind in the TARDIS with the Doctor while she, Missy and Nardole got themselves into trouble. And when the blue man had demanded to tell you who the humans were, she had lied, she had said she was the only one and that there was a mistake.  
Not another human, she had said, just me.  
She had died, protecting you.  
“I failed her, Y/N, you didn’t do anything,” the Doctor said. He kneeled down next to your bed and took your hand, squeezing it softly. “You need to get out of bed.”  
“It’s pointless any way. We’re stuck here, Doctor. I can’t go out and be cheerful with the kids like Nardole is doing while Bill is a... Cyberman!” you said.  
“You’re depressed and staying locked inside isn’t helping anything,” the Doctor said.  
“I’ll do what I want,” you hissed.  
The Doctor sighed. “Fine. Tell me what you want then.”  
You thought about that for a moment. “I want a hug.”  
“Come here,” he smiled.  
You curled up in his arms, hiding from the terrible world.

You couldn’t look at Bill. She was standing in front of you. You studied the dirty ground.  
“Hello...Y/N...” the mechanical voice still made you shudder.  
“Hey,” you whispered, “look, don’t think I’m scared of you, all right? Because I’m not. I’m just... sorry for what happened. Really sorry.”  
“I...understand...”  
You looked up. “You do?”  
“Not...your...fault...” Bill said.  
You smiled. “That’s nice, but I should have done better. Still, thank you. For saving me. By saying that you were the only human. I really really really wish we could have gotten there earlier. I can’t imagine, ten years there.”  
“I...knew...that...you...and...the...Doctor...would...come,” Bill said.  
“Well, well, it’s the refrigerator and crybaby!”  
You looked at the Master who had finally left his room where he was probably cooking up some evil plans with Missy. The idiot. You hated him with every fibre of your being, but you couldn’t even look at Missy. She was the reason this had happened to Bill. You had really believed the Doctor when he said that she had changed.  
“What...” Bill asked flatly.  
“He calls me crybaby because I cried...when I saw...you,” you admitted. You turned to the Master. “Idiot, go bother someone else.”  
“It’s much more fun to talk to the two of you,” the Master said, leaning closer. “It’s always nice to figure out what the Doctor sees in you stupid humans.”  
He pointed at Bill. “You know, you had a decent face before all of this. But this one here is just plain ugly...really, are you such a good fuck that he keeps you around, crybaby?”  
“Leave us alone,” you whispered.  
“I hit a sore spot, didn’t I, dear?” the Master asked.  
“Go...away...” Bill said.  
“Y/N, that’s your name right?” The Master asked. He stepped closer, his nose brushing yours. Just before he could continue Missy grabbed his wrist, pulling him away.  
“What are you doing? Leave the stupid humans alone, they’re not worth it,” she snapped. You glared at her.  
“Humans?” the Master spat. “Yeah, crybaby’s definitely human, but the machine here isn’t. This is like the third time I hear you talking about these creatures with empathy, Missy.”  
“Are you suggesting I’ve gotten soft?” Missy asked, gasping like it was the most horrible thing to be called in the world.  
“Just be careful...” the Master said, “also, you’ve been around this Doctor, number twelve, longer. And Y/N here. Tell me, Lady Version, does she always look at him like a lovesick fool or does she only do that when I’m around?”  
Your cheeks coloured red from humiliation.  
“You just said it yourself. She’s human. She’s got a crush. Nothing important. Come on, I want to talk to you,” Missy said to the Master. She looked at you, her blue eyes pinning you against the wall behind you. But there was something else.  
She walked away with the Master but then turned around and walked back quickly, grabbing your arm. She pulled you against her, her lips pressing against your ears.  
“He’s got more allies around here than he thinks, remember that,” she whispered.  
She let you go and then trotted off to her former regeneration.

In your nightgown you sat on the porch in the rocking chair. It was dark. You knew Hazran was still up, you had heard her murmur to herself in the kitchen. Some men were walking around the house with their guns, preparing themselves for the day the Cybermen would finally attack. Bill was back in the barn. Or maybe she was with the Doctor.  
“You have to stay away from them,” the Doctor said behind you.  
You shrieked loudly. “Could you maybe cough next time? You almost gave me an heart attack.”  
“You’ve got a strong heart,” the Doctor said. He sat down in the empty chair next to you.  
“Who do you mean with ‘them’?” you asked him.  
“Missy and the Master,” the Doctor said, “I say you and Bill talking to them. They’re manipulative.”  
“I know,” you said, “I’m not stupid, Doctor. The Master scares me. He can’t say a nice word, can he? But Missy...she said something strange. She whispered ‘he’s got more allies around here than he thinks, remember that’ in my ear.”  
“What does that mean?” the Doctor asked.  
“I have no idea. She isn’t the worst, Doctor. She actually kind of helped me? It was weird. The Master, he was saying things... you know, not nice things and she pulled him away. Even dismissed him. I know she loves ridiculing you in front of him, but... I just don’t know.”  
“What did he say?”  
You looked at the Doctor. “You don’t want to know.”  
“I do,” he said. He grabbed your hand. “Hey, I grew up with him. I know how horrible he can be.”  
“Well, like always he insulted Bill. He just likes upsetting her. And he...said I was ugly, apparently in love with you like an ‘lovesick fool’ and a good fuck,” you muttered angrily.  
You shrieked again when he kissed you, but now it was a muffled shriek. His hands were in your hair, he was everywhere. His lips moved against yours desperately and you leaned even closer.  
When he let go you sighed contently. “Wow.”  
The Doctor grinned and that made you smile. He didn’t smile a lot. When you had first met him he was so closed off. He was warming up, though. He hugged, he smiled, he laughed. He joked. And you loved it.  
“Now, whenever he says something like that again, you can think of this,” the Doctor said.

“Huh? This is me we're talking about. Me. You know what I was like. If there's more than three people in a room, I start a black market. Send me with them, I'll be selling their own spaceship back to them once a week. Please, I would rather stay down here and explode. You go and farm the humans!” Nardole complained.  
“Well, you’ll have Y/N to keep you in check,” the Doctor said, “Y/N, this is an order, if he even starts muttering about making money you’re allowed to slap him.”  
“Thank you very much,” Nardole muttered. “But Doctor, this is serious. Don’t send me and Y/N away.”  
“He’s right,” you said, swallowing thickly, “Doctor, please don’t do this. You’re going to die... just... don’t.”  
“Oh, Y/N,” he sighed. “This is the best, all right. You’ll be safe, the safest you could possibly be. You can bicker with Nardole. The children love you and-”  
“But what about us?” you asked, walking over to him. “What about us, Doctor? How are you expecting me to leave when I know it’s the last time I see you.”  
“The alternative is you blowing up here too,” the Doctor said, cupping your cheek.  
“That’s what I want,” you said, “listen, Doctor, it’s all right here. It’s not home and I know that if I absolutely had to I could survive with Nardole and the rest of the people. But I don’t want to. Gong with them means living while you’re dead. I can never see my family again, my home. I’ve been brave. You knew how depressed I was in the beginning, when we arrived here. Just let me do this. Let me die here. I’m going to die any way. Let me die with you. Let it be over.”  
The Doctor looked at you, not knowing what to say.  
“Young lady,” Nardole protested, “you’re coming with me. Doctor, don’t listen to her.”  
“I love you,” you whispered, “don’t send me away, Doctor.”  
“She’s staying,” the Doctor said.  
You smiled at him and then turned around to Nardole and Bill. Bill had been remarkably silent the whole time. Nardole looked pissed.  
“You two are both bloody idiots, you know that, right? That’s the only reason you two fit together. You’re both too stubborn for your own good,” Nardole said.  
“Thank you for your blessing,” you said, smiling at him.

“Glad you knew that,” Bill said.  
She turned to you. “Y/N, goodbye. Y’know, if there is some kind of afterlife, come and find me. You too, Doctor.”  
You fought against tears. And then you realized you hadn’t heard her robotic Cyberman voice. You had heard Bill’s voice, her warm voice that always made you smile. You walked over to her and hugged her.  
“I wish it didn’t have to end like this,” you told her.  
“But it is going to end like this,” Bill said, “but I’m glad I’ll die with you two. I thought I was going to die on a hospital bed, all by myself. That was my biggest fear. This? I can do this.”  
You smiled, letting her go. “Come on. Let’s do this. Let’s kick some Cybermen’s ass.”  
Bill left and you walked over to the Doctor who put his arm around your waist, pulling you close.  
“Hey.”  
“Hey, you,” you whispered.  
“Did you mean it?” he asked.  
“What?” you asked, looking up.  
He pressed a kiss on your forehead. “I love you. Did you mean that?”  
“Off course I meant it, silly Time Lord,” you said. You rested your head on his chest, closing your eyes. “What’s that thing you say about kindness?”  
“Without hope, without witness...without reward,” the Doctor said.  
“Well, it’s the final hour,” you told him, “come on. One last adventure. Love you.”  
He let you go. “I love you too.”

Bill found your body a few metres away from the Doctor’s.

“You may speak with them again.”  
The First Doctor frowned. “I don’t understand... who?”  
Footsteps echoed through the chamber. The Doctor looked over to the two shadowy figures entering the room. “Young ladies? Who are you two?”  
The one to the right stepped forward, only now showing her face to the original face of her Doctor. She was smiling, carefree. At peace.  
“Is he here?” she asked, “Is the Doctor here?”


End file.
